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Into My Father’s Hands

*GOD*morning… afternoon, or evening =)

I’m just going to just jump right into what is on my ♥ this morning.  I’ve come off a rough week.  Customers not so nice at work; which is hard to believe, I know, when what I do for a living is basically giving away free samples of food.  As much as that is hard to swallow *pun intended*, it’s harder for me to take the basic instinct of people to be so cruel in nature.

Things are also difficult at home, and things keep getting worse, and yet off to work I go smiling and serving, and knowing in my ♥ as well, that this is not all there is.  Each day I know that this is a day of allowing *GOD* to do His extraordinary work in my life.  satan would love for me to bash and blame *GOD*, but truth is, I cannot.  Have I ever? Sadly, being transparent here, I have.  I’ve been through the gamete of trials, loss, and pain, and sometimes, you get to that point where you question.  Just to the point though, no further.  Why?  Because, every hour *GOD* has been with me.  It has always been in times of doubt, I’ve failed Him, not He, me.  Which brings me to today’s post.

When In My Father’s Hand, There’s A Psalm in my Heart

Psalm 4:5-7

 4-5 Complain if you must, but don’t lash out.
Keep your mouth shut, and let your heart do the talking.
Build your case before God and wait for his verdict.6-7 Why is everyone hungry for more? “More, more,” they say.
“More, more.”
I have God’s more-than-enough,
More joy in one ordinary day7-8 Than they get in all their shopping sprees.
At day’s end I’m ready for sound sleep,
For you, God, have put my life back together.
*************************************************************
This is the Scripture that appeared before my eyes this morning.  A reminder of not living an ordinary life.  At times of difficulty it always seems, for me any how, to belittle me.  I use to always blame myself for being inadequate and not being able to have that “popularity” factor.  You know, the one that has everyone wanting you around.  The one where if you weren’t around, people would actually miss you.  That’s not been the case in my life.  Seldom, unless it was for meeting some work need, I’m not that girl.  Again, not saying this for pity, but to make this point: A life in-Christ isn’t about being like the ordinary, every day people.  It’s about knowing that He has amazing plans and purposes that you have to look for.  That connection that allows you to keep yourself in His Hands.
That’s where I’ve finally arrived.  As I ready myself for what will be my fifty-fourth birthday, I’m smiling.  How cool is that?  Well, unless you’ve walked in my shoes, you won’t know the connection of awesomeness that goes with that.  There is really not much going well in my life, but the basics of my life are intact.  The purposes, the plans, the movement of His allowing things to filter in to grow me, are abounding, and my only choice is to age gracefully and grow in the love, and nurturing strength of this gift called, life.
Here are some words I penned as I said good-bye to a dream of forever and always:
The scene: The Homegoing of my first husband Joe.
I’d written these words down in a book given to me by someone I’d met in the hospital where my husband died, in Huntington, WV.  She was just someone who came by to visit me from a church, I picked locally to call when arriving.  I needed some human support and so I did a little yellow page roulette.  Do you want to know the first *GOD*incidental moment here?
You might think me crazy, but I was trusting *GOD*.  I opened the yellow pages near the phone in the hospital lobby to churches.  I closed my eyes and allowed *GOD* to pick.  After all it was He who’d gotten me to this season in my life.  I put my finger down upon a church name.  I dial, I explain, and lo and behold, believe this or not.  They are more than happy to come visit.  This however is not the end but the beginning of a timing factor only *GOD* could orchestrate.  You see they sent a group of people two women and a man, turns out the gentleman knew family from the church my children were attending Awana at, back in Florida.  That’s right, close your mouth that opened in amazement.  There are not coincidences in my life, NEVER!
During this visit, and two more after, I was given a book.  She brought it to me the day before my husbands Homegoing.  You see she was going through a rough patch in her marriage.  My heart ached for her.  I know *GOD* knew that this was no ordinary day.  It was a day of His bringing together some plans He had for her and for me.  Because it is now almost 20 years, and I’m still amazed and reminded as I read these words, that we can’t ever throw the plans and dreams He has for us away.  Here is why…
***************************************************************** Words penned into the front of the book: Dated: October 20, 1992
*****************************************************************
“Jeanie” (Dodi, spelled my name wrong-no worries–the fact that she made me feel purposeful in a time of need, made all the difference to me.  She knew my heart.)
“What a fine example of the Lords strength you are!  I thank God for the opportunity of meeting you and you and expressing my love and prayers for you and Joe.  I must admit though, I went into that hospital with the idea that I would find a “broken” woman, whom I could bless with my prayers of confidence–.  Instead, I was the one who was blessed, by a woman who showed me the true meaning of “Power of Faith!”
May God Bless You Friend.
Yours in Christian Love,
Dodi _ _ _ _
*****************************************************************
~The next time I pick up the book from Dodi I have returned home to Florida, to a home once shared and ordained to be that place where you and he committed together the words: “Through richer or poorer, in  sickness and health, till death do we part.”  For my children and I, this season felt nothing like any ordinary day.  It most certainly didn’t seem like a time of miracles.
Here however are the words I penned in the cover of the book, next to Dodi’s words to me.
“Joe passed away on Oct.21st.  Never before had the words into My Father’s Hands I commit Thee, mean more.  Thank You Father God for the safety of Home, Hope, Peace, Joy and Jesus.
Joe I will never touch your face or kiss your lips and hear you speak on this earth, yet someday my Knight will come on His white horse and carry me Home to you.
*****************************************************************
His Hands
The book doesn’t end there either.  You see in the pages of the book there was another inscription.  You see, Dodi had been the book from a friend named Sue, who had inscribed it as well on May 18, 1980.  Nope, that’s not the end either.  You see, Sue was given the book with an inscription written on the pages of the book, in 1976: “Sue, A blessed Christian.  Psalms for every mood.  Thanks for sharing your gift with me.”
Normally, as I was a journaler, I’d have dated what I wrote, as I also had written another inscription in the book.  Though it’s not the date, or the time, or the season that matters.
What matters is that each of us are equally in His Hands.  For now it may be here on earth.  We may be journeying along looking for that connection to what it is, know this… it is *GOD*.  If you are missing something, but you know not what, it’s Him.  If you know of Him, but you are not experiencing the extraordinary possibilities of love, faith, joy, peace that pass your understanding, it’s you who don’t truly know Him.  Move closer, because this life you have is His gift to you.
You see what is happening, good, bad, people in, people out, all of it, are not about all of that, but the connection you have with *GOD* and His Son, Jesus Christ.
Here is what I wrote, and I now write it to whoever it is who comes by here *GOD*incidentally to read:
“The security of walking in fellowship with Him.  Being under the Shadow of the Almighty.  Giving Praise, being in the ultimate rest in Him.  The righteous are comforted.  When we feel the shadow of darkness covering us, May we rest in the Shadow of The Almighty.  For You, in us, is greater than he around us.”
Sometimes *GOD* seems far away.  When I was in one of those moments, of which I’ve had many during my CHRISTian life, I was reminded by a pastor, during that season of ten days, as I watched my husband go Home, that I, feeling in this place, was in good company.  He reminded me to look at Daniel in the lions den.   We each have different dens in our life experience that will seem as if *GOD* is far away from us.  Trust me in this, as I do indeed myself need the reminder:
The good, the bad, and even the every day ordinary are still being orchestrated by His Hand.  The very hand that holds you.
Someday we will each find the complete connection we have, one to another.  In the meantime, just know that every wish we have doesn’t always align up with His plans, His purposes, for we actually look to have ordinary plans and purposes of man in our heads, while He has extraordinary plans and purposes that go far, far beyond the scope of what we know; for now.
If you have been sort of sleepy in your CHRISTian life, wake-up.  Because you are going to miss all the sweetness that comes from experiencing all the trials and tests that come.  Who-ever I am suppose to be, and whatever it is I am still suppose to be, He is working on, and I’m allowing it.
I might have shared that I’m owning it, here on this blog, but the truth is He owns me, and I couldn’t be happier.  He after all purchased my life, with the price of His Son, my Savior.  In that alone, my hope lies.  You see that is the only miracle I’ve ever really needed.  The gift of Life Eternal.

 

Until all have heard of, and know His love,
Jeannie Bee
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