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Between A Rock

God’s justice doesn’t, and won’t look in the end,  anything at all like mans.

God's justice doesn't look anything at all like that of mans.

*GOD*morning, afternoon, evening!  If you’ve been stopping in for a while you know the drill of the greeting =)  It’s from my ♥, even though it sounds familiar and something from a movie.  Which again, I love how something as simple as my greeting is a great segway for today’s inspired post.

Today, on my heart, is how sometimes people feel as though they are stuck between a rock and a hard place, when in fact we all have a choice to choose to get stuck there, or move out.  Maybe we can’t change what is happening, but our outlook, our perspective, that can be changed.

The Rest of the Story

Today, because my husband and I haven’t secrets between us, and because we are both online, our availability to see what each other does, our passwords, history, etc., are all out in the open for each to see.  Especially for my husband, because he is the less tech savvy; which really isn’t saying much, because although I know some, and I grew up being unafraid of technology, and wanting to know as much as I needed, I’m still not, well… savvy =)

Any who…  today I glanced at a message that had come from my husbands daughter.  It made me so very sad.  I know this is being truly transparent,  but it was a reminder to me how so often people will hear the truth, can see the truth, but they just won’t accept it.  Just as it is with sharing your faith with someone.  I remember one of my brothers saying to me, “Jeannie, I know that everything you’re saying is the truth.  I know all that you are sharing is in the Bible, but I’m not yet willing to give up doing business the way I am, therefore I can’t accept Jesus.”  That’s being pretty honest.  And, although it scares me, because we are never knowing when our life will end, I give him absolute credit for being completely honest with me.  He knew the truth and he made a choice to not accept it.

This is what brings me to today’s post.  I was reading a message between my husband and his daughter who has chosen to be distant from him.  She not only chooses this, but she is unwilling to accept that there is another side to all that she believes, because of who raised her.  Top that off, she is unwilling to even accept the truth as it happened.

She shared with my husband a situation that occurred at our church during a Bible study.  She related the whole situation back to my husband and she did so incorrectly.  How did he respond?  He didn’t mince words with her, didn’t criticize her, tell her she was telling it all wrong.  Me?  You bet I would have at least re-related the situation.  Heck, it’s me, lets be honest, because we must, I would have gathered all the people back together to recount the situation.  He however, doesn’t do that.

He just let her dish out all that she had within her, bashing him, and making her mom look as though she was the best mom ever.  She blames him for not being  a part of her life, when she fails to see that it was her mom who moved away.  She believes a lie so blatant, without, as Sgt. Friday use to say, “Just the facts.”  I’m not that woman.  I like the truth  to be unfolded and it to be witnessed so that the person who is a bit confused about the facts, can see them in an unemotional way.  Sometimes, I need that too.  When emotions are involved, things can get hazy.  So here goes, because as the song says, “Life’s a happy song, when there’s someone by your side to sing along.”  I’m here to not say that my husband is always right, when he has been wronged, I’m backing him up.

His daughter recounted a situation that happened when they visited us at church.  Neither Dan nor myself knew they were coming.   They just popped in.  Now granted, we don’t know everyone at the church, it’s a big church.  Everyone doesn’t know us, so sure, someone could have made the comment, “I didn’t know Dan had daughters.”  Sure, I’ll give her that, but it’s not how she shares it with Dan.  She shares it with him as if Dan hid the fact that he was married before, had daughters, something Dan has never, ever done, not even from the get go of my meeting him.  He’s pretty transparent, because quite honestly, I’ve lived with this man, and watched in our days of meeting, his fight to find them, find them, and have his x-wife move away, or at least tell people a lie, so that he was told they were gone.

So if his daughter wanted to really know the truth, she’d talk to people who were in Dan’s life, not just her moms.  However, that is the choice she makes.  Dan never has hid that even from the people we’ve churched with.  In fact she fails to mention our calmness, our happiness in seeing them as they thought they’d make some grand entrance embarrassing him at church.  Every person in our Bible study knew Dan had daughters.  Daughters from previous marriages.  They also knew the story before Dan and I.  They also had heard before how Dan and I held back in telling the girls everything, but mostly because we couldn’t find them.  When we did, we still knew that we needed to wait upon the Lord, for the time they’d be willing to receive the truth; and know what really happened that caused this vast separation between dad and daughters.  Our Bible study,  hey even mentioned later with us, how difficult a situation that was, and how welcoming and nice we all were.

Dan’s daughter though, she however says to Dan, and I am quoting this exactly as she wrote it:  “Dan, you say you never stopped loving me, but what am I to think when we went to your church and everyone told us they didn’t even know you had daughters?”  I just want to say right here, right now, that, that statement isn’t true.  It’s so not nice to beat someone who’s already down, even further into the ground, as if you came just to shame them.  It didn’t work that day, and wow, Dan, he didn’t even comment back to here in the messages they shared, with the untruthfulness of this statement.  I however am doing it now because it’s important to share the truth.  This statement isn’t a true statement.  We even asked the girls to sit with us, and they said they had to leave, however, they sat in church without us.  Those in our Bible study knew that we’d asked them to stay, and to sit with us.  I truly believe that in their hurt hearts they were trying to get back at Dan, it didn’t work though.  People in the church who knew Dan and I did know Dan had daughters, and they did know he’d asked them to sit with him.  It’s absolutely sad how hurt people, want to continue to hurt people, rather than hear the truth.  So, for me, today, I just am posting this because Dan, just like all of us, need someone to stand firm with them, when others tell a lie.

I’d so love to assemble all those involved, even the greeter at the door, who might not have personally known Dan well, gather them all together to set her straight.  It’s what I like to do, but of course that is ludicrous, and well, as Dan and I know, we just have to accept the fact that she isn’t ready.  Plus we’ve got the Rock of Ages, and His peace that passes even ours, and of course those who witness it, and we all don’t understand it. It’s how sometimes we get all freaked out in the world when someone else doesn’t get freaked out over stuff.  Why is that?  Why is it the world gets to set some “norms” for the proper response, but not *GOD*?  I’ll tell you why, it’s because of who is living in this world putting all the blinders on all the eyes and ears of anyone unwilling to know the truth.

Commercial Interruption:

I was telling some co-workers about a great book I was rereading.  They both have Nooks, and it was a book I thought they’d both enjoy.  It actually is fitting for all that is unfolding this morning here on this blog.  If you’ve never read this book, I recommend it, especially if you are one of the people who don’t understand how some people, who are telling the truth, or have had some loss, aren’t always guilty of lying or unloving someone.  Just because people don’t act or respond in the way you expect, doesn’t mean they are lying or are unloving sort of people.  So read the book:

Now back to the blog:

I don’t like anyone believing or living in a lie.  It’s the way I roll.  It’s the way things are suppose to be, and Dan nor I have nothing to hide.  So, today as I stand upon the Rock of Ages with my husband, and his daughters who have been lied to live between a rock and some lies, continue on in believing lies about him, this is just something I need and want to share, because although my husband may disappoint me, as I do him as well, sometimes, one thing he has never done is stopped loving his daughters, or wanting and desiring for them to someday listen and believe the rest of the story.

I know this is a hard thing to post, read and know, but we all can keep up a charade of sorts in this world, but one day the truth is going to come out.  I myself believe that what you do when nobody is looking, what you say, is just as important as if everyone is looking on.  After all, if you have a belief in *GOD*, He is always looking on!  What, that isn’t enough?  Trust me, I’m not perfect, I’m a mumbler and I have to constantly remind myself how wrong it is to be so.  I’m working on that, how’s that for truth?

At some point this is all going to catch up.  Dan’s mom even shunned him for the sake of having her granddaughters, this has hurt Dan to the core of his being, and although, as a man, he shows it in a different way, as if it doesn’t matter, it does, and all he wants is for the truth to unfold.  I’ve watched his pain over the years and I know he hurts.  Who wouldn’t?  So before we start thinking, bashing and blaming all the men of the world as being some sort of low life creeps, let’s talk, let’s talk truth.

So for now, for all of us who sometimes get caught in the middle, and it happens so often for children of divorce, I’m saying, listen to the rest of the story, and someday, at which point, you won’t have any regrets.  Continue on in believing a lie though, and truly you are in the world, stuck between a rock and a difficult place, even though you don’t think you are.  Why?  Because knowing the truth is freeing.  It doesn’t make everything perfect, but it’s better than believing a lie, or maybe conjuring up in your head something that didn’t happen, and you’ve convinced yourself it did.  That is just pure mean-spirited and cruel behavior.

My prayer, my husbands prayer, is that someday these, now women, would want to hear the whole truth, and nothing but the truth, from their dad.  He has nothing to lose, as he already in real life, has lost them.  He however like me, believes that just maybe, just maybe someday, they’ll desire to know exactly what happened from their father’s point of view, that isn’t skewed by the lies of the one who ran off with man, after having several other affairs as well.  That is the truth, it’s not pretty, it’s never picture perfect, but it is the truth.

I guess I also want to share this because I constantly, as I did yesterday hear a pastor always bring about that it’s the men that cheat, lie, and have affairs.  It’s the men who love and leave.  Really?  Wake-up pastors and people, I see a lot of what happens in real life, and trust me, women are this equal, sadly it is true.  I’m not bashing women, nor men, I’m just saying we live in a time when it’s more likely a woman will seek, stray and leave, and men, they do get hurt, they do have their stories to tell, and it’s time, it’s time they stopped getting bashed to bits, and people wake up and know the truth.

Waiting On the Rock of Ages!

Psalm 75:2-6

2-4 You say, “I’m calling this meeting to order,
I’m ready to set things right.
When the earth goes topsy-turvy
And nobody knows which end is up,
I nail it all down,
I put everything in place again.
I say to the smart alecks, ‘That’s enough,’
to the bullies, ‘Not so fast.'”

5-6 Don’t raise your fist against High God.
Don’t raise your voice against Rock of Ages.
He’s the One from east to west;
from desert to mountains, he’s the One.

Truthfully writing, until all have heard and know His love,

Jeannie Bee


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